Wit & Wisdom of Golf

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

God squad - Nickname for the group of PGA Tour players who hold regular prayer meetings at professional golf tournaments.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Goer - A shot that goes much farther than normal for the club being used. A member of the flier family.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Gogolak - This synonym for drop kick gets its name from Charlie and Pete Gogolak, two former NFL placekickers.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Golf - The derivation of the word "golf 'from its Celtic and Middle English roots is obscure. Some possibilities are: gil f f (an incurable madness), gylf (a notorious liar), gullf (to beat a shrub with a short stick), golve (under; beneath; lost; blocked; submerged; stuck; obstructed), gellvo (horribly; terribly; hopelessly; awfully), galfa (my God!; oh, no!), goal fyl (to cry; to weep) and gael f (I quit). See KOLVEN.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Golf Accessories - Gadgets whose purchase improves players' games primarily by eliminating bulk from their wallets, thereby reducing excessive trouser friction and allowing a smooth hip movement in the swing.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Golf Bag - Portable container with compartments designed to hold clubs, balls and other golfing accessories. There are two basic types of golf bag, and serious players usually own one of each: an inexpensive canvas or nylon "carry" bag that would have been easy to tote around the home course if the shoulder strap hadn't broken on the 3rd tee, and a more durable vinyl or leather "travel" bag that would have been used on a golf trip if the airline had not sent it to a continent other than the one on which the course its owner planned to play is located.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Golf Cart - Two-wheeled bag carrier that decreases the exercise value of playing 18 holes of golf from about the level of two sets of doubles tennis to the equivalent of an hour and a half of shopping. With a four-wheeled electric cart, the physical demands of the game can be reduced even further to about the same as 10 minutes of rearranging sofa cushions, watering a dozen plants or one complete loading and unloading of a dishwasher.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Golf Club - 1. The basic implement in golf, which consists of a long shaft on one end of which is the head, which is attached to the shaft at the heel and has on one side a distinct face. 2. A social organisation built around a golf course and composed of a number of heels, a membership committee head with two faces, and a long waiting list of people who are going to get the shaft.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Golf Glove - An unpleasant odour worn on the hand.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Golf Grippe - Mysterious ailment whose sudden but short-lived symptoms of violent coughing and sneezing usually occur on the tee or green. It can often be cured by pounding the sufferer vigorously on the back with a 5-iron.